10 things that men do to annoy their partner

10:36 09 October 2009

Men have an almost effortless ability to irritate the ones they love by constantly doing the smallest things on a regular basis.

Read on for the 10 things that cause the most anguish for the long-suffering partners. Are they really that bad?

1. Leaving old containers around the house

While we have no problem taking out the bin now and again, we will go to almost superhuman lengths to avoid having to fill them up in the first place. Pouring water into near-empty shampoo bottles, leaving the smallest amount of milk in the container or leaving a toilet roll with one square remaining. As long as there's a tiny bit left, we're not responsible for disposal.

2. Splashing the mirror whilst brushing our teeth

We're territorial creatures. Therefore, leaving behind a little white glob of toothpaste after we've brushed is just our way of marking our territory. It says, "I've been here".

3. Leaving hair in the sink after shaving

All men hate shaving. It's time-consuming, painful and a miserable way to start the day. Therefore, as a sign of protest, we elect to leave our little beard trimmings. Women might hate it, but it's our way of celebrating victory in the battle against unwanted follicles.

4. Use 10 drinking glasses a day instead of one

Why use the same dirty, germ-ridden glass time after time when you could enjoy a crisp, sanitised one whenever you like? Not only is it healthier, but using different glasses for every drink helps us calculate if we've consumed the recommended eight daily glasses.

5. Urinating on the toilet seat

No excuse this time, but if women left the seat up when they left the bathroom, it wouldn't be an issue.

6. Litter the ground with laundry

As the saying goes, there is a place for everything, but it's far more fun to throw clothes randomly around the house. It's faster than seeking out a laundry basket and we can amuse ourselves for hours afterwards as we dodge our fallen clothes while moving from room to room.

7. Not doing any housework

When it comes to home repairs, men rule the roost. When it comes to cleaning, we haven't the faintest inclination to pitch in. We'll lift our feet, possibly move the odd piece of heavy furniture, but that's as good as it gets.

8. Burp and fart indiscriminately

Perhaps not something that should be done in polite company, but partners needn't be disgusted by such behaviour. In fact, they should be flattered that we're comfortable enough as a couple to let our natural bodily functions run free.

9. Develop a martyr complex when we get sick

When women get sick, they take the appropriate medicine, go to bed and read a good book. When men get sick, we're always on the verge of spluttering out our last breath. We collapse wherever is convenient and moan and groan until we've scared off every living creature within a six-mile radius. It's not subtle, but it gets the attention we crave.

10. Channel surf rapidly

Men consider it their right to rule the remote control with an iron fist. For women, that means having to watch an endless parade of sports programmes and bad action flicks. Making matters worse is the lightning-fast speed at which we flip through the channels.

It's not our fault - we didn't increase the channel number from four to several hundred!