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Quotes by Conan Obrien
- The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.
- The Canadian government continues to say they will not help us if we go to war with Iraq. However, the prime minister of Canada said he'd like to help, but he's pretty sure that last time he checked, Canada had no army.
- The nightmare is you spend the rest of your life being funny at parties and then people say, 'Why didn't you do that when you were on television?'
- The U.S. army confirmed that it gave a lucrative fire fighting contract in Iraq to the firm once run by the Vice President Dick Cheney without any competitive bidding. When asked if this could be conceived as Cheney's friends profiting from the war, the spokesman said 'Yes.'
- There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized.
- This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.
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