Famous Quotes

"I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that."

Mitch Hedberg on Dating

More quotes about Dating

• "Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain."

  Mae West on Dating

• "Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things."

  Keanu Reeves on Dating

• "You can't stop loving or wanting to love because when its right it's the best thing in the world. When you're in a relationship and its good, even if nothing else in your life is right, you feel like your whole world is complete."

  Keith Sweat on Dating

• "Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others."

  Wayne Dyer on Dating

• "If there hadn't been women we'd still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends."

  Orson Welles on Dating

More quotes by Mitch Hedberg

• "Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!"

• "I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake."

• "I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."

• "I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming."

• "Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?"