Famous Quotes

"If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor."

Joan Rivers on Funny

More quotes about Funny

• "A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."

  Lana Turner on Funny

• "I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."

  Ron White on Funny

• "A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."

  Bill Cosby on Funny

• "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

  Jim Carrey on Funny

• "Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."

  Elbert Hubbard on Funny

More quotes by Joan Rivers

• "The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found."

• "My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on."

• "I think I'm in a business where you have to look good, and it's totally youth-oriented."

• "Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you."

• "The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."