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Famous Quotes
"Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving."
More quotes about Funny
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"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."
Lana Turner on Funny -
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."
Ron White on Funny -
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."
Bill Cosby on Funny -
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."
Jim Carrey on Funny -
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."
Elbert Hubbard on Funny
More quotes by Erma Bombeck
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"Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub."
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"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."
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"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."
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"Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago."
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"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."